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A coach’s role in raising our clients self-esteem

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As a Coach I think our most powerful tool for helping our clients to have a stronger sense of self-worth and self-empowerment as well as higher self-esteem, is our own attitudes towards them.

It may sound a little wanky but it is important to remember that self-esteem, self-worth and self-empowerment and the path towards these are highly individual and that raising these on a long-term basis requires lifestyle changes, not just quick boosters. As a sacred sexuality coach I think it is important for me to work with my clients to help them raise these and learn to truly value themselves, not only in regards to their sexuality, but for the long-term. Too many people in the world want to knock individuals down because they don’t understand, or are fearful of that persons choice, and I feel that it is important for us to enable everyone to feel confident in the decisions that they make.

So how do we do this? I think most importantly we listen, and through listening actively and making sure we understand what our client is saying we can very quickly demonstrate that she is important, what she has to say is important, and that she is worthy of being listened too.

I think the next step is in the words that we choose:

“Poorly chosen words can kill enthusiasm, impact self-esteem, lower expectations and hold people back. Well chosen ones can motivate, offer hope, create vision, impact thinking and later results.”

– Nan S. Russell


For me these two things are key to our role of a coach and epsecially with the work that I do in supporting women to honour their sexuality and to take owenership of their sexual wants, needs, fantasies and desires. I don’t want my clients to see me as some sort of wise woman that has all the answers, because at the end of the day I bloody don’t. Instead I want them to have the confidence and self-value to be able to access their own inner wisdom and to recognise that they carry all the knowledge that they need within them.

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